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The great outdoors

I used to love it.

Ewwww how I hated it.

Ohhh how there is a happy medium.

As a younger girl I loved the outdoors. I played golf, found all the mud parties I could, road four wheels, played sports… I just loved it out there. My husband's version of outdoors was hunting, fishing, pitch a tent and ride some four wheelers. I was all “yeahhhh I live that outdoor lyfe, let's gooooo!!” 


WRONG

I was so wrong. 


That is not my kind of outdoor life. I do not eat meat. I do not touch fish. DO NOT put me on a dirt bike and for the love of all that is good in this world give me a freaking toilet. Slowly, I began letting him go fishing while I did far more girly things. Hunting trips became a manly thing and tents turned into a permanent address complete with recurring monthly bills. 

I began to resent my husband’s love for the great outdoors, the outdoors I used to love and would ache for. I did not comprehend that

" the outdoors can consist of different experiences. "

Couples often grow apart because they grow apart in their interests or activities. I knew I wanted to spend more time with him, but we did not know how that could look. 

In 2019 I had the word “live” for my word of the year. I was extremely unhealthy, both mentally and physically. My best friend suffers from seasonal depression, so she was very proactive that year working to offset the days not filled with sun rays. I spent January and February searching for health answers and after some astonishing findings, I took health into my own hands. I spent March and April digging in the dirt planting my own foods. Something I had never in my life done. I watched and learned the process. I spent May and June out by the pool daily learning to respect what the sun can do for our soul. I spent June and July learning how to be active in a healthy way for my body and would run up to, if not more, than 3 miles a day. August and September, I was out and about engaging and feeling fueled. That year changed a lot for me. I lost over 100lbs, took on major career roles and learned how to embrace my mental blocks.  A few months ago, two of my dear friends and I took off on a road trip. We decided to look into some hikes and national parks. This is where it alllllll changed for me. The first park we went to, we had over 500 acres to ourselves. We hiked all over that hillside and did some bouldering. Ultimate freedom. We then went and hiked along a river at another park. We saw large waterfalls and explored everything on foot. When I returned home, I started hiking as a form of seeing nature; and when we took off to Colorado, he fished while I hiked.  We love to float the river, so we slowly started talking canoes, rafts and kayaks. After several months of watching kayaks and researching we landed a pair and our kayaking adventures began. Once again, him fishing, and I exploring. The most peaceful form of allowing us each to thrive in our own experience of nature.  Now that we have found our groove, it is time to really explore, which reminds me…  we should run away. Editor: Hannah Holstead

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